How to avoid conversations

Yes I know, you are supposed to listen to people.

Hello! So, it's been a while since I wrote my last post and if you remember I told you that I will be writing about fidget spinners, lucky for you, this post is not about them (I'm still gathering matter though) Is it not annoying when people just won't shut up about their nonsense..? "Do this" and "Do that" like sometimes their advice doesn't even make sense. It really just annoys me that people can come up with so many daft ideas! I have the habit of avoiding such conversations by doing this.

Obviously you cannot follow my path, believe me you will lose a lot of friends if you do that, so here are a few ways to avoid all the conversations that you want to avoid.

1. Don't let the one who cannot give you any advice. Just don't let them talk. And no please don't cut their tongues out, although that might be nice, but don't, just don't do it. Don't let them talk by talking continuously. That they don't get an opportunity to talk. However there is a risk of them interjecting or you running out of things you can talk about.
   
2. Now, if for some reason shutting them up does not help try music. Yup! Get your headphones and just listen to music. They may be talking but you don't have to listen. Nu-uh! You have music! And once they are dun speaking you can pull out your headphones and ask them to repeat. They won't repeat it all over again, they will be too frustrated.
   
3. Have a strong opinion. Keep a very strong opinion and refuse to listening to anything else. Once people understand your ideals they won't really want to object or they might not want to talk to you. But hey! Look at the bright side of life! They won't object.
   
4. In case 1,2,3 don't work or turn out to be.. well.. I don't know... hazardous to your social life, fear not! I have this last mind blowing point! So try having a proper discussion, state your opinion and let the other person state theirs, and before you know it, you might be having a really well functioning conversation, or maybe an argument. But hey! Look at the bright side of life! Conversation. you will end up with a conversation.
   

That's all folks. I know its short in length but then I was too lazy to think up more points. And I may not be able to post next week. Got exams again. So that's that. And regarding the drawings, I was watching Barbie earlier, which explains the blonde hair. So yeah, bye!

Memories and all about them.

I came across this post while scrolling through Instagram that said "It's sad when people who gave you the best memories, become a memory"  and, since inspiration can be found anywhere, I am writing about this. 
And just to shed some light on my mood at the moment, I have "I'll make a man out of you" from Mulan playing in the background and am totally in love with "Look what you made me do" by Taylor Swift. 
Anyhoo just to add some more, follow me on Instagram, I go by the username @maskedhellion I would justify it some other day not right now. Now I have diverted enough from the topic, so let's get down to business to defeat the Huns!  I'm sorry I'm done! 

So, okay.. memories. Let me start by saying, all the memories you have are really exaggerated! Your brain has this annoying system of filtering out the bad stuff and discarding it, pretty much like Joy in the movie Inside out, focusing only on the good stuff. And, yes there is no issue when this happens, but you see, as humans we tend to recollect memories when we are  sad, and these extremely distorted versions of the moments you want to recollect just make you sadder.  They don't really solve their purpose, mainly because they don't have one. I guess it's safe to conclude that memories are as a matter of fact a lot like fidget spinners; solve no purpose because they have no purpose. I will criticize fidget spinners some other time, eventhough that would make me a hypocrite, I already own one. 

Now that we have got the concept of memories all cleared out for us, let us talk about the quote. We will try to decipher the meaning that is so intricately been put in it, and once that is done, I shall give my opinion regarding it.

The first part says "Its sad when people.." So, it has already been implied that the reader has to interpret it in a "aww the person left" and not in a " hey! That person made me really happy!" The word 'sad' sets the mood you are supposed to read it in. It also proves me right when I say that humans are stupid creatures who bother recollecting memories only when they are facing a major emotional issue.  Then it also gives importance to people, and yes, I like that because memories can never be objects, they can be contained in objects, but never be one. You cannot miss a box of cards because you like cards, you miss that particular box because of who gave it to you, or who you shared it with. 

Moving to the next part "who gave you the best memories..." This suggests that the people we are talking about were really close to us. That they were important, that we were able to understand them and also that they were really similar to us, which is quite obvious really, because you can't create memories with just anyone, you share them with someone who is a mirror image of you. But, what bothers me here is the usage of the word 'gave' because no one really gives you memories, you create them. They are yours and are not given by people, you decide what makes you happy and term it as a memory, and other moments you discard, in other words forget.

Next we have " become a memory." So when I read this line,  a bunch of people flashed through my mind, and yes, it is disheartening to remember that so many are gone but it is also important to understand that they are never truly gone, you may not talk but the person you are today is an amalgamation of all the qualities that belong to the people you meet along the way. I like how this ended because the word "become" clearly suggests that the memory that breaks our heart at the word is the product of our own thoughts. That it is our own creation. And most importantly, what is created can always be destroyed. But, when I say destroyed I don't mean you kill the memory, I mean to go back to the first line of our quote, to the particular word 'sad'. I want to say that you can destroy the sadness you have created while recollecting this memory.

All of this brings us to the ultimate question, what are we to do with memories? And as much as I would love to answer that question, I can't. You see, I don't know either, I'd love to but I don't. All I can say regarding that matter is, although we I may not have an answer to that question...yet, memories make us human. Sometimes they make us sad, sometimes glad and sometimes makes us feel suicidal, but in the end, those super exaggerated versions of our life teach us. The sad ones remind us that we are stronger than what troubles us at present, that we are survivors. The happy ones tell us that the person we are sharing it with means something to you and that they are a vital part of your life, and considering the time people recollect memories, you probably fought with this person, and so now you have to go and sort it all out before it is too late. The ones that make you feel suicidal, all I can say about them are that either they are very good or very bad, if the latter you need to understand that you can survive it and it will make you stronger, if the former then it means that things have changed between you and the person you shared it with, and you can't help but miss the past; here all I can say is that you should talk to this person, maybe they feel the same, maybe things will turn out to be better and just maybe all these doubts were just your insecurities and everything is okay.

That's all for today folks! See you next time when I get enough matter on the justification of my Instagram username or how utterly useless fidget spinners are, till then adieu!

And just because this will be really boring to read without a picture, here's a man riding a chicken.  

Dawn of a new day (story time!)

I know, it's been a while since I wrote a story, but since I did not have a social issue to address at the moment I thought of writing a story, it might be used as a light read.
                                               ~
It was night time, the twinkling stars did not light up the sky, for this is not how the story goes. The stars did not even twinkle. The moon did not resemble some pretty face watching over us as we slept. It resembled love, long lost love. There wasn't a pleasant breeze, there was howling winds. The leaves did not rustle, the shook, shook with fear as they held onto their dear lives for the wind might blow them away. I know, it is not the ideal picture you would want to envision. Nights are supposed to be calm. Peaceful. They are the time when dreams come true, but aren't they also the times when you live your nightmares?  Fight your deepest, darkest fear till the warm glow of the sun saves you from the torment your mind brought on you. All your thoughts come alive at night. 

Same was the case with me. All my thoughts came alive at night. And for this reason I did not sleep. For, sleep would remind me of all the things I am running from. Dreams would make me believe that there is no point running because whatever I am running from has already caught up to me.  One might wonder, what am I so scared of ? There is no monster under my bed, no demon in my head all of them are out there. In that wretched school I attend, all of them await, with their narrow minds and fake smiles. It scares me that I am a part of all these people and that I might turn into at someone just like them. There are people that I don't care about, and I should care about them. My insensitive soul has no room for those who come to me down on their knees, there are things that my past experiences have taught me. Who to trust and who I shouldn't trust, and I know, I shouldn't trust anyone. At the end all I have is me. Not those who say they are there for me, because no one can be there for me, they have to be there for themselves. 

I have made mistakes, I have let the people who stabbed me in the back, come again in my life. Even when all they still do is stab me in my back. I have trusted the wrong people and eventhough I say "trust no one" I am likely to trust the wrong doers again and again and again. I have let people give me new wounds when the ones of the past haven't healed. I have given myself new wounds just because the thought of all the impurity draining out of the cuts I make calmed me. But instead of calming me down they have drained me of all my blood and the warmth of my blood. 

No, this is not a story where I lament out my agony. No, this isn't a story at all. It is an excerpt, an excerpt from my life. That says nothing more than what friends do to you. How you would not even know that you've been stabbed when your back is bleeding. They stab you where you are vulnerable, weak and where the flesh is still healing. Opening old wounds because it is fun to watch you suffer. They don't let you heal, they reopen your wounds and console you by saying that they are there for you. But don't you know? True friends are supposed to stab in the front. With your bleeding back and aching heart, you realize the mess you have made. But, you are a survivor, the scars on your back are medals and the dawn of the new day, your victory bell. You survived the hellish war of thoughts in your mind. Tonight you must prepare for another.
                                                ~
That will be all! No, I am not upset or anything. I actually got inspiration for this from a song.
The song is called 'True Friends' by Bring me the horizon. And I just thought of writing all of this down while listening to it. Hope to see you next week!~ A

Book review: The sad and beautiful sorrows of Ava Lavender

ALERT:  The following article contains spoilers, read at your own risk!

Firstly, I know that I'm late in writing about this book (obviously! It was released in 2014) Well, yes but I read it a few months ago, and frankly speaking; no other book has ever influenced me as much as this one. Apart from 'The school for good and evil' of course! Jeez! Do I only read books with really long titles?
Anyways let me start talking about the book without wasting any more time.

 The story is about a girl who was born with wings (I know! wonderful start already!) So, in the prologue she says that she traces down her family tree to find out the reason she is born with wings. 
The book is about broken hearts, of all the three generations of her family; her mother, grandmother and herself. Her grandmother had a broken heart because whomever she loved either left or died.
These people were her mother (who disappeared quite literally), her sister who couldn't handle her sadness and cut her own heart out of her chest, her brother  who was shot in the head, her younger sister who died after she turned herself into a bird to get the attention of a man she loved but failed to do so and at last her husband, who died in his sleep. 
Ava's mother had a broken heart because of a boy she once loved, who later left for college and came back with another girl. He was delusional as he didn't know that he didn't actually love the new girl but pampered her because everyone else loved her, and he thought he should too. However he still left Vivianne, Ava's mother with two children; Ava and her twin Henry. While throughout the book Vvianne is waiting for her love to come to her, he never does and leaves her with a shattered heart.
Lastly, Ava has a broken heart too, the sole reason is her appearance. No one likes a girl with wings. Although there was a hype when she was born, because people thought she was an angel, but she was just a girl. A girl all along.

The reason I absolutely love this book is because all the characters live their life with their broken hearts, which heal in time. 
Some take long to heal, others don't. At the end, Ava escapes. I am not gonna say how, you have to read the book for that, but she does. 

I strongly believe that this book gives hope to all broken hearts, or people who are generally sad. It is amazing! Just amazing! It teaches a lot about life, in my opinion.

It taught me a few things, which are:

• Wounds heal and scars fade, no matter how long it takes.
• A shadow's kiss is shadow's bliss (delusional hearts)
• To find happiness in the most simple things
• love makes us such fools! (this is written on the cover of the book, and you won't understand it unless you read the book!)

It is written beautifully! The language is wonderful, the story is wonderful. All in all, it is a must read! 

I think I will rate it an 11 out of 10. It is therapy for broken hearts!

Just a wonderful book altogether.

That will be all. Thank you for reading! Tell me what you want to read next in the contact form which you can spot at the bottom of the page! Feel free to subscribe, all you need to do is type in your email address along side the page! And of course please share!

Much love! ~Annie!

Always remember it's "garbage can", not "garbage cannot"!

Aloha people! Today we will talk about you! You Garbage! You disgusting piece of garbage! Felt bad? Hated the fact that me, a complete stranger had the audacity of calling you that? Well, what about the times you say all this to yourself ? It's time you stop calling yourself that! Let's keep this a light read, I won't go in too much depth, just like a little summary, no details, no assumptions, just facts (pro'lly)

Reasons to stop:

• Leave something for the haters
• Learn to love yourself
• Treat yourself no less than a queen or king
• Respect yourself.

Good effects of not being garbage:

• You will be a happier person
• You might get more people to surround you
• You wouldn't bother about people calling you names because you will know yourself.
• You will realize your true potential when you stop demotivating yourself.

Now, with that being made clear. Let me share with you a story.

So, during the last few months of my ninth grade I practically isolated myself from all my classmates, actually everyone in general. And while I was working on myself, a lot of people started calling me a lot of things. I was so accustomed to the buzz that followed me wherever I went, that it made me doubt my decisions. I thought of socializing again, just so that they'd just stop! It made me so sad and I started hating myself for the inability to make effective decisions. And just before I was about to socialize, came the beautiful angel who slapped me back into reality. I sit with her now. She didn't really say anything regarding the topic, but understood me really well, and started talking to me, instead of me having to approach her, she approached me. She wanted to talk to me unlike all those who talked of me behind my back. The faith that I lost in my decision making, restored itself back in me. I decided that instead of getting lost in blaming myself, calling me all the things that people say about me and being my own enemy, I would rather be my own person. I would know myself, be clear in stating what I want or don't want. What I agree with, what I don't. Say what I want to, not giving two hoots about what people think about it, and whether it's politically or emotionally incorrect. It is what I feel. It is right for to me, my thoughts are flawless for me! I am not garbage, dumb or trashy for thinking my thoughts and believing what I want to. Not knowing answers to questions doesn't make me dumb. Not knowing things that others know doesn't make me stupid. It makes me human. It makes me, me.

 

And while I mentioned about my little angel, let me not refrain from sharing all the others that helped me (it might as well give you some idea on what people you matter to sound like, and give me a chance to express my gratitude.) I will not be taking any names though. I might just give them letters.

• My bestfriend, A who although doesn't meet me now a days but is still in touch with me over the phone.
• My other bestfriend, B who has an english paper tomorrow, she is the girl who fuels my 'angry teenager' spirit. She should be studying, but I know for certain she is on YouTube at the moment. She supported me when I felt miserable about myself for not being like others, and now thanks to her I have never been more happier with myself.
• My third and hopefully last bestfriend (for I find it really cumbersome to type 'bestfriend' again and again). He is supposed to be C, but I'd like to call him P. P for piggy. That's what I call him. And no, its not like affectionate 'piggy' its more like 'filthy-swine-piggy'. P has stayed with me through thick and thin, been there when I feel bad about myself, and even when I'm not (just to make me feel bad about myself by calling me a buffalo.) 
• My friend C, who although seldom talks to me (because he is 'oh so popular, living his too glam to give a damn' life) but is always there whenever I open my lunchbox.  He knows how to make me smile when all I want to do is shut myself up in a box and cry. In the comparison of people who are with you when you are having a great life but leave when you are miserable and people who are rarely there but seem to magically appear to help you, he'd be the latter. 

That'd be all. But of course can't end this article without thanking my mother. Who although is Satan most times is also my greatest strength and support system. I would be a depressed lunatic running about the streets if it weren't for her.

Hope you learnt a little something about calling yourself garbage. However if you are more comfortable in addressing yourself as garbage, always remember

"It's always 'garbage can', not 'garbage cannot'."

A simple guide to friends.

Hi all! I am back with another post! And just like most of my articles, this one will also be related to social issues that we face a lot of times. I have noticed that people are sad because they think they don't have friends. Not entirely true, so that's why today I will help you categorize your friends.

1. Recognize your importance.

Imagine, this colourful bubble is you, each colour represents a part of your personality. Then there are the two moods that Bubble feels. Happy and sad. When Bubble is happy, it as bright as the sun, with it radiating light. When Bubble is sad it becomes a blobby grey cloud. There are also certain amount of people who dearly love Bubble. Now, it is important for Bubble to realize that people who are with Bubble only when she is happy and radiates light, are the fake people. And those who are with Bubble even when she is sad, are the people who actually care about her. Bubble should never part with them.

2.The messy table logic.

To help you understand better, there are two types of people, people who matter, and people who are the trash in your life and are just occupying space. The trashy people are toxic for you, because they are either there for you when you don't need them to actually be there, or are entirely not there for you, in both cases they are not good for you.

                                                        

Visualize your social circle as a messy table. You need to clean it. And like every time you clean a table, you will have to discard of certain items, you will keep some for decoration and there will be things that you will actually need. 

I have divided these into three categories.

1. Trash
2. Golden trash
3. Golden friends.

So, now elaborating further. The trash are the people that you don't really need and all they do is make you sad and hurt your feelings. You hold onto them because you either don't realize how harmful they are or you are too lazy to get rid of them. But, it is time that they leave. Just how Garbage rots and causes diseases, these people too, rot and make you sick.


Next we have Golden trash. These are the people who don't affect you as much as Trash but, are not good for you. You hold onto them because you think that they will come in handy sometime, that they will be loyal when needed, but they aren't. Just like trash they are occupying space, that is all. It may be difficult to part with them and that is because you think that they are going to be with you forever. They aren't.

Golden friends. These people will actually be there for you, and you can count on them no matter what. A person generally has two to three golden friends, not more. Others are just trash, rid yourselves of them.

An important note: When I say rid yourself of the trashy people, I DON'T mean that you should fight with them.

The more you clean your messy table the more place you will have for new trash and probably some Golden friends. Then you clean again. It's a continuous cycle.

That is all for today! Hope it helps! Also, before I go, please do share my article and you can also subscribe, all you have to do is put your email id in the "never miss a post" section. It is really easy and once you have subscribed you wouldn't even have to type in the URL everytime, you can read the articles on your mail! And now ba-bye!

Reasons to leave your typical girl gang.

When I say typical 'Girl gang' I don't mean your friend circle. There is a difference between being a part of a toxic group of friends and a non toxic group of friends. 

So, how do you distinguish between a toxic group and a non toxic group? Well, I will explain to you the structure and functioning of a toxic group so that it is easy for you to avoid.

A toxic group of girls functions in the following way:

It is led by a skinny girl who is in the position of authority because of her appearance, society has taught everyone that the girls who are thin are the only ones who are beautiful, and the blame not only goes to the society but also to Barbie dolls, from a young age girls are taught that Barbie is good at everything because she is thin. This is what settles in our heads, and hence, all the insecurities. And who benefits from our insecurities? The girls who are naturally skinny.

Since they believe that their physical appearance makes them superior to the people around them, it gives them the right to treat people the way they want. And people like me, who are not skinny don't question their authority because we are taught to seek public approval and follow the crowd. These girls think they can have the world but frankly speaking, they just have arrogance. 

After this, these girls have their minions, there is also variety in them. These go as follows:

1. The average body type: This is the type of the girl who is neither skinny nor plump, but rather healthy and well built, these are the girls that should be worshiped, if that's how the world must function. These girls are only in the group because either they are insecure or like attention. Either ways they are completely brainwashed and of no use.
2. Fat girls: These are the optional type, they are only included to make the skinny girls look skinnier. They are not valued otherwise. Their presence does not matter.

This brings me to tell you that why they are included. 

Well, the plump girls are treated as court jesters. For the sole cause of entertaining the queen bee, they are used as an extra vote to any decision the skinny alpha makes, they are not allowed to have their own opinion. They should be equipped with a good sense of humor and should be a part of every picture so that the skinny girls look skinnier. The only compliment these girls will ever get is 'cute'.

You see, more the number of plump girls, the skinnier one looks, because people have a horrible habit of comparing. These girls are not people, they are pests; pests that are feeding off of everyone's insecurities. The skinnier one looks, the popular they get. And you know how, well due to compliments like "She is so beautiful, I mean her figure" 

And now, let me tell you why it's time to part with this group.

They are using you, whether you are an average or plump girl, the skinny girls use you to look good in public, to look popular, to feel exclusive, like teen royalty.

You don't matter to them, they don't care whether you are upset, you are not allowed to defy their opinion, and your opinion does not matter. And if that does not help in getting a clear picture then, try experimenting.

Their constant presence and need to specify that they are skinny will make you insecure of your own self. You would want to know why they get the attention, and sooner or later you will realize that it's because of their figure, and you would want to be like them, but they won't let you.

You deserve better, even when you try to be like them, they will tell you that they like you they way you are, or it is pointless living for public opinion, which by the way is ironical, because they themselves live for public opinion.

You will soon realize that the friends you have are not because they want to know you better, but because they wanna get closer to the skinny girls, they use you to get closer to the popular girls. Your worth should not be defined by the friends you have.

Your personality matters. and till the time you are part of the group, you won't know what kind of personality you have. You won't know who you are and will constantly have to rely on them. And life is way more than that.